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The Butcher’s Notebook: 8 Great Steak Trends Across America

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For ZagatKelly Dobkin reports: It may have started with female-friendly chainlets like STK in the early 2000s, but lately chefs and restaurateurs all over the country are redefining the steakhouse in new and unexpected ways. Below, we’ve rounded up some of the most notable carnivorous trends of the last year – and shared our picks for the best places in the country to try them yourself. Vegetarians, turn away now…

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“Hipster” Steak

One trend that is decidedly new in the last year is the rise of steakhouses that appeal to the millennial set – young food-obsessed urbanites who are cuisine-curious with money to spare (cough: hipsters). M. Wells Steakhouse in Long Island City, Queens, is at the forefront of the trend. Quebecois duo Hugue Dufour and Sarah Obraitis of the now-retired M. Wells Diner made a name for themselves by cooking up eclectic, globally inspired plates not afraid of offal, bones, fat or gore. Read the rest of this entry »

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[VIDEO] BBQ APOCALYPSE: Using Molten Lava and Lightning to Cook a Steak

“You get a really thick char on the outside which, frankly, tastes delicious. And when cut into it medium-rare, it’s juicy and unctuous.”

— Sam Bompas

A couple of badass cooks decided to use molten lava and lightning to cook a steak. Their names are Bompas and Parr, and let’s just say they’re known for doing insane things with food.

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Our Roving Arthropod News Analyst and Food Critic reports: “When Japanese chefs discover this, they’ll refine the technique, then open Lava grills in Tokyo. This is only the beginning.”

[See more from our Roving Arthropod News Analyst]

According to Gizmodo, their most recent stunts include vaporizing gin and creating a high-voltage chandelier that runs on pickles. Yes, pickles. Read the rest of this entry »


White House Officials: ‘Very Significant’ Immigration Executive Actions Needed for the ‘Survival of the Democratic Party’

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From The Butcher’s Notebook: White House officials said on Friday that President Barack Obama will enact “very significant” executive actions on immigration at the end of summer, “not because it’s good for America, but because it’s essential for the survival of the Democratic party.”

“American voters are beginning to figure out that progressive policies don’t work, because they’re not designed to work. There’s only so long we can get away with this before voters rebel, and special interest groups stop donating money. We can’t change American’s minds about this. We can’t win the argument, so we have to change the voters,” said a DeShove-it-Americamocratic campaign official, speaking informally, on the condition of anonymity. “Can we get another drink over here?”

“The president assured us that pissing off Republicans is personally more important to him than policy success.”

“Look. We may not be able to change the voters overnight. But we can sure as hell accelerate the process, by granting citizenship to the Democratic voters of tomorrow,” adding “without it, the Democratic party has no hope in hell of surviving past the next twenty years.”

Sitting in a corner booth in the lounge of a Chinese restaurant in suburban Washington D.C., after a few lines of coke, a few tabs of MDMA, a few injections of sodium pentathol, and a fresh round of drinks–mistakenly assuming he was speaking off the record–the senior White House official ventured further.

“Democracy is a means to an end. You need it, temporarily, to get your party in power. Once you do that, you have the tools to undermine it, a stage at a time. Not all at once. Otherwise, people catch on.”

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“Look. Our opponents are at a disadvantage, because they’re all hung up on ‘playing by the rules’. You know, the constitution, rule of law, separation of powers, all that idealistic, parchment-paper 18th-century crap. We’re not interested in ‘rules’, and ‘laws’. They are a barrier to our goal of accumulating power. That’s how the big boys did it, before the American revolution.” Read the rest of this entry »


Every Day is April Fools’ Day at punditfromanotherplanet

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Some highlights from today’s prank stories..

Exclusive: Controversial Female Teachers’ Group Dedicated to “Woman-Boy Love” Pledges Legal Support to Meredith Powell

‘Woody Whistle’ Given to Girl Scouts of America members in Manhattan to Help Protect Girls From Woody Allen

Charles Krauthammer Shows Up Drunk on Megyn Kelly’s Set, Unannounced

And here’s a golden oldie, based on a real photo, from late 2013…

Russian President Vladimir Putin demonstrates to reporters how he grabbed Obama’s balls and extracted unprecedented foreign policy concessions

You can usually find the malarky in The Butcher’s Notebook. Find any good April Fools stories today? Send them in, we’ll add them to the collection.