Unhinged ‘Professor’ Whose Hissy Fit at NYU Went Viral Turns Out to Be Lobster Porn Artist

lobster-porn

In the video, she can be heard telling police to beat up Gavin McInnes.

Megan Fox writes: There are more lifestyles than you can shake a stick at in modern America. Whether you want to live as an animal, or a six-year-old, or a lizard, there’s just no end to the choices one can make regarding how you live your life these days in the free world. (This may be our penance for the invention of robot vacuum cleaners.

"I can't even begin to tell you how disturbing this is"

“I can’t even begin to tell you how disturbing this is”

With no physical labor left to do, human beings turn insane, apparently.) How exactly do you tell your parents you’ve decided to go into “lobster porn” like social media sensation Rebecca Goyette, whose expletive-filled hissy fit outside NYU went viral (NSFW). I imagine the conversation went something like this via email.

Dear Mom and Dad,I know you had high hopes that I would take my art degree and perhaps teach children to paint or create beautiful landscapes to sell to tourists in some tropical location, but none of that is going to happen. I wanted you to know your money was well spent because I have found a niche in the performance art community: Lobster porn.  Read the rest of this entry »


Badminton and ‘Lobster Dinners’: What Prison Life Is Like When You’re Filthy Rich 

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Matt Shea writes: Google image search “Edward Davenport” and you’ll see a mosaic of celebrity selfies featuring everyone from the Prince of Monaco to 50 Cent. “Welcome to the website of Edward Davenport,” the website of Edward Davenport proclaims, “one of London’s most flamboyant and best-known entrepreneurs, as well as a true English gentleman from an established British family.”

But this public persona—that of the aristocratic socialite—is Eddie’s trick. It’s how, in the past, he gained people’s trust and got what he wanted. The man behind that selfie smile—the subject of the new VICE documentary Wolf of the West Endhas bankrupted business partners and made an estimated £34.5 million [$51.5 million] through fraudulent activity, according to the Serious Fraud Office (Davenport says the figure wasn’t anywhere near that much).

The 2000s were good to Eddie. After buying Sierra Leone’s London embassy—the Central London mansion, 33 Portland Place—for just £50,000 [$75,000] in 1999, he turned it into an arena for decadent sex parties, spending the next ten years entertaining celebrities and aristocracy. However, in 2011, “Fast Eddie” was convicted of engineering a multi-million pound fraud and sentenced to nearly eight years in prison, before being released in 2014 as an “act of mercy” because of ill health due to one of his kidneys failing.

So what was it like to go from a life of luxury to a South London cell? How would a serial partier cope with life between the sexless walls of Wandsworth Prison? What’s life in jail like for a wealthy white-collar criminal? I spent a fair amount of time with Eddie during the filming of Wolf of the West End, so I got back in touch to find out.

VICE: What’s your worst memory from prison?
Edward Davenport: There were occasions where there was a staff shortage or things would get canceled. So when you normally play badminton on, you know, a Saturday afternoon or something, and then suddenly it gets canceled due to staff shortages, it’s not like you’ve got a lot of other things you can arrange at short notice.

So your worst memory from being in prison was having to reschedule badminton?
[Laughs] I’ve been raided in the middle of the night before.

Why did they raid you?
I think they were looking for illegal contraband items.

What about, like, the solitary nature of it—the boredom and the lack of intimate company. Did that not get to you?
Well, it was a bit like being a virgin again when I got out. I think I had plenty of women before I went in. I mean, maybe if you’ve been into prison and you haven’t done anything before with your life, but I had a bloody busy 45 years where I had had, you know, I suppose you could say, more than anyone could ever dream of and ever want. I had been out most nights—I’d done everything, you know.

[Read the full story here, at VICE]

The staff are almost up to the standards of politeness and friendliness and professional-ness as hotels. They call you by your name, you know.

OK, but there must have been some bad bits about prison.
Well, having a kidney transplant wasn’t exactly ideal. This is supposed to be a very civilized country, a very sophisticated country, yet here I am for a white-collar crime being taken to do dialysis and, during the whole of the dialysis, left in handcuffs

The kidney story does sound quite bad, but what about the rest of it? I mean, prison can really get to some people. Are you telling me you experienced none of that?
I’ve seen none of that. I think you might have been doing articles on prisons in different countries.

OK. In that case, what was good about prison?
Well, I became quite good at badminton. There wasn’t much else there except playing badminton that was quite good.

Is the rumor true that you used to somehow get the prison guards to give you lobster for dinner?
Well, of course I’d have my own food, yeah. Read the rest of this entry »


Salvador Dalí’s ‘Lobster Telephone’

"I can't even begin to tell you how disturbing this is"

“I can’t even begin to tell you how disturbing this is”


[VIDEO] Matt Jacobson and Tanya Rivero Discuss Maine Lobster Flavor & Fishing Rules

Maine Lobster Marketing Collaborative executive director Matt Jacobson and WSJ’s Tanya Rivero discuss the highly lucrative Maine lobster market and efforts to maintain future fishing sustainability.

"This represents a complete collapse of our aquatic immigration system"

“Sustainability?”


Underground Lobster Porn Goes Mainstream! Über Fashion: Chloë Sevigny in Marfa Journal

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"That's the biggest goddamn turtle I've ever seen."

“This is the happiest day of MY LIFE!”

chloe-lobst2

Marfa Journal


Lobster Boats Frozen in New England Harbor

"I just had a hot bath, I'm feeling much better. Who do you have to blow to get a cup of coffee around here?"

“Who do you have to blow to get a hot cup of coffee around here?”

FRIENDSHIP, Maine – The bitter cold weather is taking a toll on New England’s lobster industry which is losing a significant amount of money this winter.

Frozen waters in Maine have left lobstermen stuck on the mainland again this week.

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The boats are sitting frozen and stuck and ice is preventing many lobstermen from leaving the harbor. Read the rest of this entry »


Thousands of Squat Lobsters Wash Ashore in Newport Beach

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"I celebrate this new wave of arthropods to our shores."

“I celebrate this new wave of arthropods to our shores.”

 


Rare Calico Lobster Turns up in Maine

Calico Lobster-AP

BETHEL, Maine –  The owner of a Maine bait and tackle shop says she found a rare calico-colored lobster that was caught off the state’s coast.

Sarah Lane says the crustacean, covered in orange blotches, appeared in a crate of lobsters brought from the Pemaquid Lobster Co-op in Bristol last weekend.

"We're investigating that other 5%'"

“I’ve always had a soft spot for girls with freckles.”

The University of Maine says the odds of finding one are about one in 30 million.

Lane named the lobster “Freckles.” Read the rest of this entry »


Sacré Bleu! Maine Teen Nets Rare Blue Lobster

"That's a rare one, indeed. They have their own special dialect, and use a lot of slang, hard to understand, but they sure are pretty, aren't they?"

“Blue lobsters sometimes deal with prejudice, in the lobster community, because of their exoskeleton color. But they’re real pretty, I think.”


LOBSTER APOCALYPSE: WSJ Food Writer Calls for Radical Escalation in War On Shellfish

"I've got a gun, a passport, some cash, and a wig. Can I borrow your car?"

“I’ve got a gun, a passport, some cash, and a wig. Can I borrow your car?”

GPOA-lady

Know Your Enemy

1. Cup of drawn butter

2. Plastic bib

3. Fistful of moist towelettes

— from the Lobster Self-Defense Handbook

 For WSJ, Elizabeth Gunnison Dunn writes: Summertime, at its very best, announces itself in little rituals: the sprint down the beach to feel the ocean hit your toes, the beer yanked from an ice-filled cooler. Up and down the New England coast, the first lobster of the season emerges steaming from an aluminum pot and is served with a little cup of drawn butter, a plastic bib and a fistful of moist towelletes.

WSJ-Lobsters

“Claws like boxing gloves, prized for its hefty size…”

— Human Predator, describing targeted species

Then there is the second lobster, likely tossed in butter and mayonnaise and piled on a toasted roll. The third one might arrive by way of a creamy bisque. By then, most of us have come to the end of our lobster repertoires. We’re out of steam.

“I look for the lobster that scares me the most.”

— Chef Michael Hung

Lobster might be the ultimate totem of the seaside experience.Though it looms large in the summer vacationer’s imagination, it has traditionally been pigeonholed into a tediously narrow range of preparations.

“This scrumptious shellfish is nothing to be intimidated by.”

— Wall Street Journal, promoting shellfish combat tactics

This is a shame, because lobster has so much to recommend it. It’s sustainable, for one, in an ocean full of creatures being fished toward extinction. It’s lean. It has also, in recent years, become a bargain.

The cost of meats, fish, poultry and eggs has risen, overall, by almost 8% in the past year, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, but lobster is getting more affordable. Thanks to a glut of so-called soft-shell lobsters—the delicate specimens in new shells caught off the coast of Maine in the summer months—the past three seasons have delivered deals for anyone buying close to the source. Consumers at the seaside this summer are finding local prices as low as $5 a pound, as much as 50% below where they were a decade ago. Read the rest of this entry »


Jeffrey Tucker: Blessed Fish! How the Market Brought It to Your Table

Here’s to fish, and here’s to the technology that has made it possible to enjoy, cheaply and easily, in every household.

Jeffrey Tucker writes: In the Renaissance, painters often featured fishmongers selling fish from tables right there for anyone to buy. Why? For the first time in history, people had money to buy things, from actual merchants. Fish for sale to anyone and everyone was a lovely sign of wealth, an indicator of progress.

Fish preparation now takes less time than it took the burger place yesterday to make me lunch.Still, you could only get it if you lived near the sea. Fast forwarding a few centuries, when I was a kid in West Texas, eating fish at home was unthinkable. Fish
sticks, maybe. Otherwise fish at home didn’t exist. By culture, tradition, and by sheer availability, we ate beef.

“Dramatic things have happened to the market for fish over the past 10 years. It is wholly changed. Now you can get incredibly great fish at nearly every supermarket”

Even today, many people are reluctant to prepare fish at home. This is my strong impression from talking to friends and colleagues.

cara-makan-seafood-yang-aman-dan-sehat

This usually traces back to one bad experience. Maybe it came from childhood. The fish was fishy, boney, and just generally dreadful. That one experience can color a lifetime of food choices.

“Hardly any time passes between swimming around and landing in a separately sealed individual packet, ready for eating. Massive improvements in technology (thank you, capitalism) have improved the way fish is caught and brought to market. Now it is caught, cleaned, deboned, and flash frozen right on the boat.”

In my own case, I thought for years I would only eat fish at a restaurant. Only they know how to do it right, I thought. Surely I could never replicate that process at home. At most, I could make those awful breaded fish sticks Mom would drag out on dreaded occasions.

seafood-safety

The Glorious Fishy World

Well, dramatic things have happened to the market for fish over the past 10 years. It is wholly changed. Now you can get incredibly great fish at nearly every supermarket. At Wal-Mart, I recently found a vast selection — tilapia, flounder, swordfish, salmon, whiting, halibut, lobster, and so much more. The prices were ridiculously low. I’ve been sampling them all for months.

[Read the full story here, at Foundation for Economic Education]

What’s the secret? Head to the freezer section. I know it sounds inferior. Wouldn’t you rather have fresh? Not any more.

Hardly any time passes between swimming around and landing in a separately sealed individual packet, ready for eating. Massive improvements in technology (thank you, capitalism) have improved the way fish is caught and brought to market. Now it is 41eQn3GP4ZL._SL250_caught, cleaned, deboned, and flash frozen right on the boat. Hardly any time passes between swimming around and landing in a separately sealed individual packet, right there ready for the eating.

[Order Jeffrey Tucker ‘s bookBit by Bit: How P2P Is Freeing the World” from Amazon.com]

And you don’t have to worry about timing. In the old days, when you bought fish, you had to eat it that night or risk having it become slimy and gross. Now it can stay in your freezer and be ready for you when you want it.

For the first time, the equivalent of fresh fish, stunningly yummy, is available to nearly everyone at low prices, ready for preparation right in your own kitchen. And despite the reputation that fish once had of being difficult to prepare, now it is easier than pork or beef, and even faster.

In other words, cut open the bag, and it is ready to go.

I find this just amazing. That’s a shorter period than it took the burger place yesterday to make me lunch.

And it is a fraction of the price. Read the rest of this entry »


UPDATE: Former White House Chef Walter Scheib’s Body Found in New Mexico

AP_Walter_Scheib_WH_chef_

 reports: Authorities have found the body of missing former White House chef Walter Scheib a few miles from the hiking trail where his car was last seen, New Mexico State Police confirmed.

“The body was discovered off the immediate trail approximately 1.7 miles from the base of the trail. No further details are available at this time. Rescue workers are still gathering information.”

— New Mexico State Police Sgt. Liz Armijo

Scheib, 61, was last seen on June 13 heading to hike a trail in the Taos Ski Valley 10 miles outside of Taos, New Mexico.

pfap-whchef1

State police and volunteers had been searching for Scheib since Wednesday, after a family member reported him missing and his car was discovered at the trailhead.

[Also see – Former White House Top Chef Missing After New Mexico Hiking Trip]

Cell phone data that showed Scheib’s last known location helped rescuers narrow their search – and eventually led them to his body Sunday evening.

Manuel Balce Ceneta/AP Photo

Heinrich Lauber, left, Chef in Charge of the Official Receptions of Switzerland, shows former White House Chef Walter Scheib, center, in this file photo, cooked lobsters, at the Willard InterContinental Washington, July 26, 2004. Manuel Balce Ceneta/AP Photo

“The body was discovered off the immediate trail approximately 1.7 miles from the base of the trail. No further details are available at this time. Rescue workers are still gathering information,” New Mexico State Police Sgt. Liz Armijo said in a statement. Read the rest of this entry »


Immigration Chaos: Millions of Jellyfish Invade Pacific Northwest Beaches

Lobster-aquatic-immigration

Jellyfish are washing up on shore in Oregon and Washington

Eliza Gray Millions of jellyfish are washing up on the shores of beaches in Washington and Oregon, CNN reports.

It is not unusual for the bluish-purple species called Velella velalla to turn up in the spring, but a sail fin on their body usually keeps them away from the shore. This spring, though, their sails were no match for the wind.

Alan Rammer of the Washington State Department of Fish & Wildlife's marine conservation and education division, holds a handful of the blue-hued velella jellyfish in Ocean City, Wash., on May 14, 2004.

Alan Rammer of the Washington State Department of Fish & Wildlife’s marine conservation and education division, holds a handful of the blue-hued velella jellyfish in Ocean City, Wash.

The species, also known as “purple sailor,” has stinging cells that are not seriously harmful to humans, but the Oregon State website warns it’s best to avoid rubbing your eyes after touching them or walking barefoot through them on the beach.

[TIME]


[VIDEO] Superman Declared a ‘False God’ in Official Batman v Superman Trailer

After a rough cut leaked earlier in the day, Warner Bros. released the first official trailer for Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice on Friday. In it, Superman is declared a “false God” by pundits. [TIME]

"I"m a pundit, and I would never say that, that's itresponsible."

“I”m a pundit, and I would never say that, that’s itresponsible.”

The movie, based on the DC Comics, hits theaters March 25, 2016.


‘Purple Sailors’: Jellyfish-Like Creatures Pile Up On Oregon Coast in Massive Die-Off

jelly-like

ROCKAWAY BEACH, Ore. (AP) — Thousands of jellyfish-like creatures have been piling up on Rockaway Beach in what appears to be a massive die-off.

KGW-TV reports ‘Velella velella’ typically live in the open ocean. When warm water and storms draw them near shore, the wind blows them onto beaches, where they die in piles.

“No, I don’t think they’re edible.”

 

The animals are like a cousin to the jellyfish.

They are commonly called “purple sailors,” ”little sail,” and “by the wind sailors.”

velella_bae_an_anaon

The Oregon Department of Fish and Wildlife says die-offs occur each spring along beaches from Oregon to California.

 Q13 FOX News


Rare, Gigantic, Big-Ass 475-Pound Leatherback Sea Turtle Rescued in South Carolina

turtle

(CNN) — Marine biologists at the South Carolina Aquarium are treating a rare, 475-pound leatherback sea turtle that washed up Saturday on a nearby beach.

The episode marks the first rescue of a leatherback sea turtle in South Carolina and is believed to be only the fifth live rescue of this species in the United States, according to the South Carolina Department of Natural Resources.

"That's the biggest goddamn turtle I've ever seen."

“That’s the biggest goddamn turtle I’ve ever seen.”

The endangered turtle was found stranded on the Yawkey-South Island Preserve, a wildlife refuge near Georgetown, South Carolina. Rescuers named it Yawkey.

Because the turtle is believed to be a juvenile — rescuers say it’s probably less than 10 years old — and has not reached sexual maturity, biologists can’t yet determine its sex.

(Photo: Courtesy of South Carolina Aquarium via CNN)

(Photo: Courtesy of South Carolina Aquarium via CNN)

Rescuers found no external signs of trauma to the reptile, although it was hypoglycemic. Staffers with the aquarium’s sea turtle rescue program gave it antibiotics, vitamins and some time to recover at their facilities. Read the rest of this entry »


The Anchor Chair Is Not Worth Saving

BW-strange-TV-retro

Admitting that the way we were getting news was desperately flawed—at least until a few years ago—is really admitting to a larger failure in ourselves. So, of course, we will never do it.

ben-collins Ben Collins writes: It turns out the omniscient anchorman was always a lie, even before the most popular and trusted newsman in America got caught parading one around at an intermission of a hockey game, saying his helicopter was shot at when it wasn’t. Brian Williams will spend the next six months without pay decidedly not reading the news on NBC, and it’s a wonder if he’ll ever be back.The real wonder, of course, is why the Nightly News as an idea—a costume party for bravado and the status quo—is still around at all, and why it’s still mild heresy to say people like Jon Stewart replaced it a long time ago.

jordan-levin-hed-2014

“What gets lost is a proverbial sense of communal experience. We’re not all getting it through Walter Cronkite. We’re not all going to experience him choke back a tear. The danger is that we become isolated in our own echo chambers—that we don’t get different points of view that open us up to thinking about other people. That’s the dystopian view. That’s the fear—that everyone’s essentially in their own bubble.”

— Jordan Levin

Admitting that the way we were getting news was desperately flawed—at least until a few years ago—is really admitting to a larger failure in ourselves. So, of course, we will never do it.We now simply have better ways of getting information, although nobody wants to admit that—because watching the news for a half-hour every night and receiving all of it was as convenient of an idea as it was a naïve one.
"Anchor chair? I've never really seen the value in it.."

“Anchor chair? I don’t really see the value in it..”

Instead, we have couched very real advancements in the idea that sincerity, storytelling and vulnerability are simply functions of comedy. We have said that The Daily Show or The Colbert Report or even The Onion—a publication with arguably more cultural expectation 24 hours after a big event than the New York Times editorial board—are all fronted by comedians who have been able to co-opt the news for better, timelier punchlines.
walter-cronkite

The reality is the opposite: The protections that we now know need to be provided to TV journalists—the expectation that they could be human, that they could quickly admit to mistakes without being permanently reviled, that they could unveil their process while reporting on what they know and don’t know—are really only provided to comedians.

Comedy and news collided not because comedy needed the news, but because news needed the protections of comedy.

Here’s how we know it: The most prominent cases of clear government corruption that were brought to light—and eventually killed—by a TV show in the last year did not come from the Nightly News, a tepid-by-design, rote reconstruction of the day’s events told slowly and dispassionately, as not to ruffle the feathers of the powerful.

Those scoops—acts of journalism in the truest sense—happened, instead, on places like Last Week Tonight, hosted by Daily Show alumnus John Oliver.

The Dumbest Anchormen - National Review Online

His show, for example, highlighted an FCC Commissioner—one whose last job was the head of the telecom lobby—proposing rules that would have allowed that same cable lobby to rake consumers over the coals by artificially slowing down the speed of some websites while simultaneously raising prices. His show launched a protest that was so swift and immediate it crashed the FCC’s servers. That commissioner, Tom Wheeler, did a 180—and last week proposed different rules that would protect the Internet against that kind of throttling.

[Note: If Ben Collins actually thinks the Obama administration-pressured FCC’s 300+ page stack of regulations aimed at transforming the internet into a highly-regulated government-controlled public utility is as simple as consumer-advocacy “rules that would protect the Internet against that kind of throttling” one might conclude that guys like Ben are also among those Kool-Aid drinking journalists who shamelessly promoted the Affordable Care Act as a popular, successful “reform” package that made health care “more affordable”. If this sloppy comment about Tom Wheeler raises serious doubts about the credibility of everything else Ben’s article, so be it.]

[Also see — FCC COMMISH: OBAMA TAKING UNPRECEDENTED DIRECT CONTROL OVER INTERNET CHANGES]

[More — FCC Commissioner Blasts Net Neutrality Proposal as ‘Secret Plan to Regulate the Internet’]

[Congress investigating WH role in influencing FCC on net neutrality]

Then it happened again with payday loans, which prey only on the poor. (The Consumer Protection Agency, as of three days ago, is trying to put an end to them.)

And then again with civil forfeiture—a process that allowed police to seize assets from citizens who were never arrested or charged with a crime. (Attorney General Eric Holder laid out an edict effectively putting an end to it.)

cronkite-gutfeld

These issues were on the fringe of public consciousness. Fifteen minutes, a lot of reporting and a little bit of comedy later, three pieces of legislation that would’ve negatively affected less fortunate Americans—or, in the first case, all Americans—were about to be killed.

The Nightly News couldn’t dream of doing this that efficiently. Read the rest of this entry »


LA Supermarket Sells Raccoons As Food, Health Officials Not Amused

20121121cookedracoon-thumb-625xauto-288284

TEMPLE CITY (CBSLA.com) — The Health Department has taken action after a local supermarket’s frozen foods section featured an unusual item.

Inspectors from the LA County Health Department visited the Metro Supermarket in Temple City on Tuesday, after being informed that the market was selling raccoons as food.

"I've tried grilled raccoon, and I have to say, it's really not bad."

“I’ve tried grilled raccoon, and I have to say, it’s really not bad.”

Employees at the market declined to appear on camera, but did show entire raccoons, frozen, bagged, and selling for $9.99 per pound. The employees say raccoon is considered a delicacy in China.

Customer Christina Dow was at the market, and upon seeing the frozen raccoons, filmed the scene on her cell phone. She shared the video on social media.

ARKive image GES068267 - Northern raccoon

“I’ve tried lobster, it’s actually quite good”

“The way it’s packaged in the store, it’s so real, and it’s so fresh, and you don’t see chickens with their feathers and blood all over them, and their expression, with their tongue hanging out,” Dow said.

5a raccoon

Dow also went on to contact the LA County Health Department, who says that selling raccoons as food may indeed be perfectly legal, depending on the origins of the meat. Read the rest of this entry »


Too Much Weed. No, Really, Too Much Weed: Growers Struggle With Unexpected Oversupply

Too Much Pot

Many of the state’s marijuana users have stuck with the untaxed or much-lesser-taxed pot they get from black market dealers or unregulated medical dispensaries

SEATTLE (AP) — Washington’s legal marijuana market opened last summer to a dearth of weed. Some stores periodically closed because they didn’t have pot to sell. Prices were through the roof.
Six months later, the equation has flipped, bringing serious growing pains to the new industry.

“Every grower I know has got surplus inventory and they’re concerned about it. I don’t know anybody getting rich.” 

— Cannabis farmer Scott Masengill

A big harvest of sun-grown marijuana from eastern Washington last fall flooded the market. Prices are starting to come down in the state’s licensed pot shops, but due to the glut, growers are — surprisingly — struggling to sell their marijuana. Some are already worried about going belly-up, finding it tougher than expected to make a living in legal weed.

Dali

“Too much what?” — Salvador Dali

“It’s an economic nightmare,” says Andrew Seitz, general manager at Dutch Brothers Farms in Seattle.

State data show that licensed growers had harvested 31,000 pounds of bud as of Thursday, but Washington’s relatively few legal pot shops have sold less than one-fifth of that. Many of the state’s marijuana users have stuck with the untaxed or much-lesser-taxed pot they get from black market dealers or unregulated medical dispensaries — limiting how quickly product moves off the shelves of legal stores.

“State data show that licensed growers had harvested 31,000 pounds of bud as of Thursday, but Washington’s relatively few legal pot shops have sold less than one-fifth of that.”

“Every grower I know has got surplus inventory and they’re concerned about it,” said Scott Masengill, who has sold half of the 280 pounds he harvested from his pot farm in central Washington. “I don’t know anybody getting rich.”

"I wouldn't worry too much about it. My sources tell me it's a natural supply-demand fluctuation."

“I wouldn’t worry too much about it. My sources tell me it’s a natural supply-demand fluctuation.”

Officials at the state Liquor Control Board, which regulates marijuana, aren’t terribly concerned. So far, there are about 270 licensed growers in Washington — but only about 85 open stores for them to sell to. That’s partly due to a slow, difficult licensing process; retail applicants who haven’t been ready to open; and pot business bans in many cities and counties.

“It’s the volatility of a new marketplace.”

— Randy Simmons, Washington State Liquor Control Board

The board’s legal pot project manager, Randy Simmons, says he hopes about 100 more stores will open in the next few months, providing additional outlets for the weed that’s been harvested. Washington is always likely to have a glut of marijuana after the outdoor crop comes in each fall, he suggested, as the outdoor growers typically harvest one big crop which they continue to sell throughout the year.Weed is still pricey at the state’s pot shops — often in the $23-to-$25-per-gram range. That’s about twice the cost at medical dispensaries, but cheaper than it was a few months ago.  Read the rest of this entry »

‘Clouds of Intellectual Self-Regard’

“Obama entered the presidency trailing clouds of intellectual self-regard. His carefully cultivated persona was of a uniquely thoughtful, judicious, deliberative, evidence-driven man comfortable with complexity. The protracted consideration of Keystone supposedly displayed these virtues.”

oyster

“Now, however, it is clear that his mind has always been as closed as an unshucked oyster.”

— George Will

"I concur."

“I concur.”

Read more… Washington Post


Brave Clerk Fights Off Armed Robber with Unregulated Full-Metal Napkin Dispenser

crook

Washington State Legislature to Introduce Metal Napkin Dispenser Control Act to Establish Guidelines for Napkin Dispenser Background Checks, Regulate Production and Ownership of Defensive Full-Metal Napkin Dispensers

BURLINGTON, Wash. — Cops are on the hunt for a serial armed robber and police say his last target was a clerk inside the Lafeen’s Donut shop on November 30.

But thanks to a brave store clerk police now have a clear view of the suspect’s face.crime-fighter

Investigators think the same man is responsible for robberies stretching from Burlington to Bellingham.

“It just makes me mad,” said clerk Sara Mora, “It makes me angry.”

Mora was working in the back of the store when she heard a customer walk in.

But when she saw a man guy holding a gun, she did exactly as she was told.

“Right when he flashes his gun I’m like, whoa,” she said. “This is the end of me, my life ends right here.”

The thief made Sara empty the register. But when the suspect turned to cut the phone lines, Sara made her move and armed herself with a metal napkin dispenser.

During the struggle Sara pulled down the suspect’s hood. Investigators said the image of the man captured on video is their best chance to identify the suspect.

“It gives us a very description of who we’re looking for,” said Officer Jed Cates of the Burlington Police Department. “He’s obviously shown that he’s willing to do it, this has occurred 4 times in Bellingham.”

Investigators believe the suspect is responsible for other armed robberies in Bellingham; several were also captured on surveillance video. Read the rest of this entry »


[PHOTO] Musée Océanographique de Monaco

The Oceanographic Museum – Monte Carlo, Monaco

This monumental architectural work of art has an impressive façade above the sea, towering over the sheer cliff face to a height of 279 feet (85.04 m). It took 11 years to build, using 100,000 tons of stone from La Turbie. Read the rest of this entry »


This Chinese PhD Student Just Wrote an 80,000-Word Dissertation on Braised Chicken

chicken

The footnotes alone could fill a library

Alyssa Abkowitz reports: Braising chicken is a science in itself.

That’s according to an 80,000-word doctoral dissertation by a 34-year-female PhD candidate in China’s Shanxi Province, written in an effort to find out how spices impact the taste of meat.

"I've only read 55,000 words so far. I'll report back when I've read the whole thing."

“I’ve only read 55,000 words so far. I’ll report back when I’ve read the whole thing.”

Sun Lingxia, a student at Shanxi Normal University, conducted a two-year study on braised chicken to help pave the way for standardizing production of traditional food on a large scale, she told the Southern Metropolis Daily, a local newspaper in Guangzhou.

“While Chinese microbloggers have nicknamed the dissertation “The Most Yummy Paper,” one of Ms. Sun’s professors said scientific research on food is quite normal, citing examples including Japanese research papers on bread.”

By comparing differences between chicken braised with star anise and those braised without the popular spice, she was able to control taste by quantifying the temperature, time and power needed to make braised chicken taste the most delicious. To ensure consistency in her experiments, Ms. Sun used one factory in Henan Province to source all her chicken and only used star anise from Guangxi, the report said.

Ms. Sun focused on star anise because it’s affordable and commonly used in both braised chicken and braised pork, two popular dishes in China. Read the rest of this entry »


Medicated in Hotpot Paradise: Restaurants in China Serving Food Enriched with Opium

"I just got back from China, and I'm so high, I have no idea where I am. What parking lot is this? Is this Boston? San Francisco? Hong Kong?

“I just got back from China, and I’m SO high…I have no idea where I am. What parking lot is this?”

“Hotpot, noodles and lobsters are the most common dishes to get this treatment…215 restaurants in Guizhou province were shut down for spiking their food with opiates.”

For China Real Time, Richard Silk reports: Chinese consumers are used to food safety scandals, from toxic heavy metals in their rice to cooking oil scraped up from the gutter. After those outrages, they might be grateful for some good old-fashioned painkillers in their soup.

crt_hotpot_G_20110503071231

“Last month a noodle shop owner in Shaanxi province admitted dosing his dishes with poppy buds after a customer tested positive on a drug test.”

The website of Xinhua, the Chinese government’s official information agency, reported Thursday that restaurants around the country are routinely spiking their dishes with poppy shells, which contain opiates like morphine and codeine, to keep customers coming back.

Hotpot, noodles and lobsters are the most common dishes to get this treatment, Xinhua said. The tactic isn’t new – 215 restaurants in Guizhou province were shut down for spiking their food with opiates way back in 2004 – but has been receiving increasing media coverage as multiple incidents have come to light. Read the rest of this entry »


Poll: Obama 39% Job Approval Low-Down

poll-o

Gallup: Result is based on a three-day rolling average

"We're down in Bush territory. Down on the parking lot low."

“Dude is down in Bush territory. Way down low on-the-parking-lot-pavement low.”

via Gallup Daily

Read the rest of this entry »


‘Hey, it Still Might Work’

95 Percent of BBC Viewers Think Multiculturalism Has Failed

A whopping 95 percent of respondents to a BBC straw poll have said that they think multiculturalism in Britain is a failure. The poll was taken yesterday morning during the BBC’s Saturday Morning Live show, and asked “Is multiculturalism working?” Just 5 percent said “Yes”; 95 percent said “No”.Screen Shot 20140831 at 144923

“fortunately the actually scientific polling suggests that’s quite a pessimistic answer.”

Breitbart LondonJames Delingpole was a guest on the show. During the discussion of the results, he said: “I think the thwacking great majority in that poll says it all. The multicultural experiment in Britain has failed totally and people have finally realised how much it has failed. Rotherham was just one example; we’re seeing cases all around the country. It has been a disaster. I think that this is going to be the turning point.”

Also on the show was the left-wing journalist Owen Jones, who extolled the virtues of interracial sex and claimed: “fortunately the actually scientific polling suggests that’s quite a pessimistic answer. Yes there are always tensions which we need to work on. We need to bring our communities together. But Britain has one of the highest levels of interracial relationships in the whole world.”

"We're investigating that other 5%'"

“I’m investigating that other 5%, but so far we haven’t found anyone willing to go on the record.'”

“We need to break down segregation like faith schools. We concentrate poor people in particular areas because of the lack of social housing, and that disproportionately affects people from black and minority ethnic communities.” Read the rest of this entry »


Government Publishes Detailed Instructions on How to Safely Roast Marshmallows

farmhouse-fall16

And if a whole marshmallow is a little too much for your overweight kids, the article suggests scrapping the whole idea of roasting marshmallows, and instead using marshmallow creme out of a jar

“Put a piece of fruit on a roasting stick, dip quickly in the crème and roast over indirect heat until a delicious golden brown.”  gpoa-stamp

The U.S. Forest Service on Friday published a nearly 700-word article on how to safely roast marshmallows, all in preparation for Saturday, which is National Roasted Marshmallow Day.

“You’re still having campfire fun, but the focus is on a healthier evening snack.”

As one might expect, the article is riddled with safety tips that might make you think twice about even carrying matches into the forest at all, let alone actually igniting a marshmallow and putting your family’s life at risk.

"It's all about risk management."

“It’s all about risk management.”

“First, let’s talk safety,” the article says. “Never start a campfire when there are fire restrictions in place. The restrictions are put in place for your safety and for the safety of others.”

It also warns that children should be given a stern talking-to before any of the “fun” begins. Read the rest of this entry »


FOOD in the KONG with FONG

Warning-fong-food-link

Read the rest of this entry »


CNN Poll: Trust in Government Lower than an Arthropod on a Gravel Parking Lot Low

"See how low to the ground I am? According to my analysis, public faith in government is even lower."

“See how low to the ground I am? Research shows that trust in government is even lower.”

“The number who trust the government all or most of the time has sunk so low…”

CNN‘s  delivers the bad news: Four decades after President Richard Nixon resigned, a slight majority of gpoj-approved-panicAmericans still consider Watergate a very serious matter, a new national survey shows. But how serious depends on when you were born.

” …that it is hard to remember that there was ever a time when Americans routinely trusted the government.”

— CNN Polling Director Keating Holland

The CNN/ORC International poll’s release comes one day before the 40th anniversary of Nixon’s resignation on August 9, 1974. With the Watergate scandal escalating, the second-term Republican president had lost much of his political backing, and he faced almost certain impeachment and the prospects of being removed from office by a Democratic-dominated House and Senate.

House-Congress-DC

There’s a big generational divide over the significance of the scandal, with a majority of those older than 40 describing Watergate as a very serious problem and those under 40 saying it was just politics.

“Just 13% of Americans say the government can be trusted to do what is right always or most of the time.”

The poll also indicates that the public’s trust in government is at an all-time low. Read the rest of this entry »


Survey Finds 85% of Chinese Consumers Say They’ve Given Up Shark Fin Soup

"Next they'll be coming after my tail! Can't we start a similar public awareness campaign about lobster bisque?"

“Oh, great. Next they’ll be coming after my tail.”


[VIDEO] BBQ APOCALYPSE: Using Molten Lava and Lightning to Cook a Steak

“You get a really thick char on the outside which, frankly, tastes delicious. And when cut into it medium-rare, it’s juicy and unctuous.”

— Sam Bompas

A couple of badass cooks decided to use molten lava and lightning to cook a steak. Their names are Bompas and Parr, and let’s just say they’re known for doing insane things with food.

""

Our Roving Arthropod News Analyst and Food Critic reports: “When Japanese chefs discover this, they’ll refine the technique, then open Lava grills in Tokyo. This is only the beginning.”

[See more from our Roving Arthropod News Analyst]

According to Gizmodo, their most recent stunts include vaporizing gin and creating a high-voltage chandelier that runs on pickles. Yes, pickles. Read the rest of this entry »


Potheads Claims Responsibility for Brooklyn Bridge White Flag ‘Surrender USA’ Prank

New York City Police officers stand at the base of a white flag flying atop the west tower of New York's Brooklyn Bridge, Tuesday, July 22, 2014. Two large American flags atop the Brooklyn Bridge were replaced sometime during the night with white banners. Police crime scene and intelligence detectives were investigating how the flags were switched out on the famed span that connects Brooklyn and Manhattan, and there were no reports of suspicious activity, police said. (AP Photo/Richard Drew)

New York City Police officers stand at the base of a white flag flying atop the west tower of New York’s Brooklyn Bridge, Tuesday, July 22, 2014. Two large American flags atop the Brooklyn Bridge were replaced sometime during the night with white banners. (AP Photo/Richard Drew)

Cannabis Probably Okay for your Health, but Spectacularly Bad for Democracy

"That guy makes a remarkably convincing case for marijuana-legalization opposition groups. I suspect it's a false-flag operation by an opposition group member posing as a pro-pot activist."

“That guy makes a remarkably convincing case for marijuana-legalization opposition groups. I suspect it’s a false-flag operation by anti-pot activists.”

“It stands for peace. It stands for surrender. It would make people think about what’s going in. Also the wars. Our solution to the wars is for people to smoke weed and chill out.”

For the Washington Times, Jessica Chasmar reports: A marijuana activist said he and his group are responsible for swapping two American flags atop the Brooklyn Bridge for two white ones — an act that has baffled New York police for more than a week.pothead-rev-head

“Please smoke the Peace Pipe with the holy herb and rebel against the military industrial complex and the evil one percent. That is the meaning of why we put up the bleached American Flags. Remember to recite the new Pledge of No Allegiance…”

— Mr. Green, alleged pot advocate

“The Reverend Bud Green,” 49, claimed responsibility for the July 22 swap in his blog. He told the New York Daily News on Thursday that the prank was actually the first part of a two-part strategy, with another set of flags going up later. Increased NYPD surveillance on the bridge foiled that plan, his post said.

“…Please repeat after me, I Pledge no Allegiance to the United Corporations of America, and to the right wing dictatorship for which it stands, one nation, under the devil, with liberty and justice for only the rich pigs who can afford it.”

“It was interesting that nobody knew what to make of it,” Mr. Green told the Daily News. “It was interesting that people took it as a terror risk. We believe in nonviolent civil disobedience.”

Read the rest of this entry »


ENDING THE GLOBAL PANIC ABOUT BUTTER: Cease Fire Called in War on Fat

"Are you serious? Butter?"

“Are you serious? Butter?”

Time Cover:  FAT is GOOD

For TIMEBryan Walsh writes:

 In 1977, the year before I was born, a Senate committee led by George McGovern published its landmark “Dietary Goals for the United States,” urging Americans to eat less high-fat red meat, eggs and dairy and replace them with more calories from fruits, vegetables and especially carbohydrates.

By 1980 that wisdom was codified. The U.S. Department of Agriculture (USDA) issued its first dietary guidelines, and one of the primary directives was to avoid cholesterol and fat…(read more)

[Also see Butter: One of the Great Comeback Stories in U.S. Food History]

[Read more Yes, Saturated Fat is Good: Undoing Decades of Government Misinformation About Health]

Read the rest of this entry »


Author Daniel Halper: The Clinton Machine’s Counter-Attack Playbook Revealed

"No comment! The last time I said anything negative about the Clintons, they threatened to hunt down every member of my family and BOIL THEM ALIVE"

“No comment! The last time I said anything negative about the Clintons, they threatened to hunt down every member of my family and BOIL THEM ALIVE. 

Halper_Daniel.lower_.bioExcerpt from “My battle with the Clintons” in this week’s Politico, by author Daniel Halper:

…Of course, nearly everyone in Washington has seen the much-vaunted Clinton PR machine in action. It’s very predictable. Here’s how it works:

1) Media intimidation tactics: Following their usual method of operation, the first thing Team Clinton would do is attempt a media blackout. A producer with CNN said I’d never be able to get any airtime on her show because the Clintons punish networks that give space to their perceived enemies. So far, even claims in my book that were well sourced with on-the-record quotes—such as Bill Clinton offering counsel to John McCain in how to defeat Barack Obama in 2008—have been all but ignored by the mainstream media.

 (Photo by Mike Segar-Pool/Getty Images)

(Photo by Mike Segar-Pool/Getty Images)

2) Defame and attack: There would be repeated efforts to turn me into a kook or right-wing hit man. Though they haven’t yet gone so far to label me a “crazed stalker” like they did with Monica Lewinsky, the reliable Clinton aide Nick Merrill has repeatedly deployed a classic Clinton spin line on my work—before it was even on sale, mind you, and presumably he hadn’t yet read it. “It’s sad to see Daniel Halper join the discredited and disgraced ranks” of other authors supposedly out to get them at all costs, he emailed the Huffington Post. Read the rest of this entry »


GLOBAL PANIC OF 2014 REACHES CHINA: Freakishly Large, Bizzare Flying Insect Found in Sichuan Province, Experts Say

giant-bug-china-gallery

World’s largest flying aquatic insect, with huge, nightmarish pincers, has been discovered in China’s Sichuan province

Large enough to cover the face of a human adult, this scary-looking insect is also known among entomologists as an indicator of good water quality.

(CNN) – According to the Insect Museum of West China, local villagers in the outskirts of Chengdu handed over “weird insects that resemble giant dragonflies with long teeth” earlier this month.

barack_obama-panic

“Let me be clear. This species was not found in our hemisphere. It was found over there, in China.”

Several of these odd critters were examined by the museum and found to be unusually large specimens of the giant dobsonfly, which is native to China and Vietnam.

 "I think the media is overreacting. I can kick that bug's ass"

“I think the media is overreacting. I can kick that bug’s ass”

The largest one measured 21 centimeters (8.27 inches) when its wings were open, according to the museum, busting the original record for largest aquatic insect held by a South American helicopter damselfly, which had a wingspan of 19.1 centimeters (7.5 inches). Read the rest of this entry »


Good News For Smokers: Your Life is Worth Billions and Billions and Billions of Dollars

"Wow, I'm going to take up smoking again"

“Wow, I’m going to take up smoking again”

Jury Awards Widow $23.6 Billion in Florida Smoking Case

For the NY Times reports: A jury in northwestern Florida awarded a staggering $23 billion judgment late Friday against the country’s second-largest tobacco company for causing the death of a chain smoker who died of lung cancer at the age of 36.GPO14-Approved-Vintage

“When they first read the verdict, I know I heard ‘million,’ and I got so excited. Then the attorney informed me that was a ‘B’ — billion. It was just unbelievable.”

The company, the R. J. Reynolds Tobacco Company, promised a prompt appeal.

Michael Johnson Sr. died in 1996 after smoking for more than 20 years. In 2006, his widow, Cynthia Robinson, of Pensacola, sued R. J. Reynolds the maker of the Kool brand cigarettes her husband had smoked, arguing that the company had deliberately concealed the health hazards its product caused.

“He really did smoke a lot.”

The four-week trial ended Wednesday. The jury deliberated for 18 hours over two days, first awarding $17 million in compensatory damages and then emerging at 10 p.m. Friday with a $23.6 billion punitive judgment. Read the rest of this entry »


GLOBAL PANIC OF JULY 2014 UPDATE: President Obama Plans 16-Day Martha’s Vineyard Vacation on $12m Estate

For the WashingtonExaminerPaul Bedard reports: It’s going to be hot tubs, basketball, tennis and golf for the first family this summer, having set plans for a 16-day vacation in Martha’s Vineyard, Mass., on a $12 million, 10-acre forested estate on the southwestern corner of the island.

"I have no comment"

Our Roving Anthropod News Analyst and frequent guest at Martha’s Vineyard says: “Hot tubs?”

Reports from the Bay State indicate that President Obama and his family will vacation August 9-24 at the 8,100-square foot, beachfront home of a Democratic donor that includes a pool, hot tub, basketball and tennis court.

President Obama reacting as he misses a shot while golfing on the first hole at Farm Neck Golf Club in Oak Bluffs, Mass., on the island of Martha's Vineyard last year. AP Photo

President Obama reacting as he misses a shot while golfing on the first hole at Farm Neck Golf Club in Oak Bluffs, Mass., on the island of Martha’s Vineyard last year.  AP Photo

Mad Martha’s Ice Cream last year developed a new flavor called “Barack My World,” espresso ice cream, macadamia nuts and caramel

It will be new digs for the first family, who have summered on tony Martha’s Vineyard every year of Obama’s presidency, except in 2012 when he was running for reelection.

Obama is expected to be accompanied by top aide Valerie Jarrett, a regular summer resident of Oak Bluffs

Read the rest of this entry »


LEAVING A TRAIL OF SLIME, THE GLOBAL PANIC OF JULY 2014 REACHES LAX

African-snails

67 Extremely Invasive Jumbo-Sized Weaponized Ass-Whooping Giant African Snails Intercepted at LAX

“They can be carriers of several parasites which are harmful to humans, one of which can lead to meningitis”

For Breitbart.comKerry Picket reports: U.S. Customs and Border agents may have to allow young unaccompanied illegal immigrants into the country, but giant African snails are turned away.

lobster-interview

Our Roving Anthropod News Analyst and noted Achatina Fulica expert concurred: “You don’t want to mess with these Giant African snails. It’s a nightmare…don’t get me started…”

According to a CBP press release, U.S. Customs & Border Protection (CBP) agriculture specialists at Los Angeles International Airport (LAX) inspected an air cargo shipment declared as 67 live snails. Paperwork accompanying the giant foreign mollusks described them as Achatina Fulica for human consumption.

“These pests are a very serious threat to our agriculture, natural ecosystem, public health and economy.”

—  From the CBP release

The snails came in from Lagos, Nigeria in two plastic basket packages, CBP says, and weighed slightly more than 35 pounds in total and were destined for San Dimas, California. Read the rest of this entry »


CARNAGE IN NEW YORK: Meat Mess on Upstate New York Road Stinks Up East Coast

Global Panic of July 2014 Centers on Meat Spill on Upstate New York Roads, Stench may Reach Manhattan by Sundown

lobster-interview

Our Broadcast Media Unit was on the scene to interview local residents. The only New Yorker willing to go on the record was this lobster, who confirmed “it smells really bad. “

The Associated Press reports – QUEENSBURY, N.Y. –  Some car owners are raising a stink after driving a road littered with meat in upstate New York.

chopper

No actual helicopter was called to monitor the New York meat disaster, or fan away the meat smell. This image is here to convey the gravity of the situation on the ground. And because it looks cool. 

The Post-Star of Glens Falls reports that dozens of chunks of meat were on the road in front of a mall Thursday in Queensbury, about 60 miles north of Albany.

drivers17n-3-web

Police believe meat fell off a truck that might have been heading from a farm or slaughterhouse to a rendering plant, but no one has come forward to claim it.

Pieces of meat that apparently fell from a truck closed down one lane of Aviation Road in Queensbury late Thursday afternoon, July 10, 2014. (Don Lehman -- dlehman@poststar.com)

Pieces of meat that apparently fell from a truck closed down one lane of Aviation Road in Queensbury late Thursday afternoon, July 10, 2014. (Don Lehman — dlehman@poststar.com)

Read the rest of this entry »


Rand, Straightforwardly Libertarian, Gets a Warm Reception at Harvard

rand-paul-harvard

For NROA.J. Kritikos writes:  On Friday afternoon, Kentucky senator Rand Paul spoke at Harvard’s Institute of Politics. Despite the libertarian and conservative arguments he put forth to the Cambridge audience, he was received warmly, though his more detailed legal arguments on national-security issues need some fine-tuning.

Senator Paul’s prepared remarks primarily addressed privacy and national-security issues, beginning, appropriately enough, by alluding to the Boston Tea Party. After describing how the British used general warrants to harass colonists, and the subsequent writings of James Otis on the topic that helped catalyze opposition to the Crown, Senator Paul addressed privacy concerns that have arisen since 9/11. The checks and balances required by the Constitution, in his view, have been partially abandoned in response to the threat of terrorism, highlighting the Patriot Act as an example.

That law was part of counterterrorism efforts responding to 9/11 that Paul characterized as being marked by “hysteria.” While the law certainly was enacted rapidly, suggesting that America has been hysterical in its pursuit of al-Qaeda and its associates seems more reminiscent of his father than the more mainstream image Senator Paul has sought to cultivate. Read the rest of this entry »