EXCLUSIVE: WEAPONIZED COFFEE DELIVERY SYSTEM SEEN IN MAJOR U.S. CITY
(SEATTLE) Spotted near a public market, August 24, 2014. Parked, unattended. Reports that it transports containers of psychoactive chemicals, powerful stimulants commonly found in high-grade roasted coffee beans, though unconfirmed, are currently under investigation.
“Based on the estimated storage size, I wouldn’t underestimate the payload of a vehicle like this.”
— Unnamed State Department Official
According to our analysis, a truck this size this could give an entire urban neighborhood — perhaps even an entire city — a full-scale nervous breakdown.
“The potential neurological affects on an unsuspecting population are enormous. If this armoried vehicle is filled with containers of rich, dark-roasted, military-grade caffeinated material, we would very much like to have a sample, so our lab can analyze it,” said Senior chemical Lt. Jack McGuffin.
Local law enforcement agencies neither confirmed or denied knowledge of militarized coffee delivery vehicles. The Department of Homeland Security declined to comment. Further research indicates that this truck is owned and operated by Motofish Coffee Company. We sent a reporter to investigate, with instructions to collect samples, and pick up donuts on the way back. Read the rest of this entry »
— Christopher Taylor (@KestrelArts) August 15, 2014
- This Is The Terrifying Result Of The Militarization Of Police – Business Insider (businessinsider.com)
- Pics: The Terrifying Result Of The Militarization Of Police (dailypaul.com)
- Ferguson: live video streams of SWAT team assault on protesters (boingboing.net)
- American Militarism: The Chickens Have Come Home to Roost (campaignforliberty.org)
- NBC might want to rethink its aggressive Twitter campaign for ‘Chicago PD’ (dailydot.com)
- The left professes ignorance about conservative, libertarian concerns over police militarization (hotair.com)
- Free societies require more of police than turning tough situations into militarized zones (hotair.com)
- Opportunism knocks in Missouri (powerlineblog.com)
Swat truck repositioned, gun pointing straight at protesters pic.twitter.com/BYN58JDfgV
— Conetta (@BmoreConetta) August 13, 2014